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Merry Christmas!
Forum: General Discussion
Last Post: Barnabas
12-25-2021, 01:18 AM
» Replies: 1
» Views: 281
Reality is less appealing...
Forum: Crossdressing Discussions
Last Post: Barnabas
12-21-2021, 02:45 AM
» Replies: 6
» Views: 1,658
Fear and Envy
Forum: Crossdressing Discussions
Last Post: Barnabas
12-18-2021, 12:53 AM
» Replies: 19
» Views: 17,305
What tempts you?
Forum: General Discussion
Last Post: Signpost
12-17-2021, 10:13 AM
» Replies: 6
» Views: 3,289
Great article on identity
Forum: Links to Share
Last Post: Barnabas
12-16-2021, 12:40 AM
» Replies: 6
» Views: 1,672

 
  The rights of parents
Posted by: Barnabas - 10-03-2019, 05:44 PM - Forum: Transgender Discussions - No Replies

Informative and depressing article on parents battling against public school policies for transgender children. The schools do not seem to be complying with parents' wishes for their own children.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/v...546527001/

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  Good news
Posted by: Barnabas - 09-14-2019, 08:25 AM - Forum: Homosexuality Discussions - No Replies

So happy they are putting back people's freedom to hear ideas that they want to hear. With all the changes in the definitions of conversion therapy that have gone on recently, this is a real win. People should be allowed to go to counseling because of unwanted sexual thoughts. People should be allowed to go to counseling to help them manage and not give in to every sexual desire.

https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/...r-n1054226

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  1 Corinthians 11
Posted by: Barnabas - 09-13-2019, 09:02 AM - Forum: Links to Share - No Replies

Here is a good article on 1 Corinthians 11, which I've also written a blog post about. This article does touch on the distinctions between men and women and appearance.

http://themelios.thegospelcoalition.org/...nthians-11

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  Help with a trigger
Posted by: Privateaccount1964 - 09-05-2019, 07:09 AM - Forum: General Discussion - Replies (3)

A little background:

I’ve been fortunate to find a good counselor who specializes in Christians dealing with addictions including sexual addictions. One of the things we’ve been talking about is identifying and evaluating triggers, and the seeing if we can see what the need is behind it and figure out how to address that need in a more appropriate manner than cross dressing. 

So here’s my problem... I’ve had an experience that is a trigger, and I’ve written a journal entry to try to address it, but I can’t make the mental leap from taking it from the fantasy, to figuring out what the need really is and how to address that as a man instead of as a pretend woman. I’ve pasted my journal entry below... WARNING!!!!! It’s somewhat explicit, and if you think my trigger/fantasy might trigger you please don’t read it. But if you do, I sure could use some help identifying what the real need is or the real gain is.


[font=.SF UI Text][font=.SFUIText-Semibold]The most recent trigger is a nylon covered ankle in pretty high heels I saw getting out of a car on in a movie. It was supposed to be sexy, and it definitely was...she was. I’m not sure what the image is telling me about the “what” or “why” of the urge, but I want to reproduce it. I want the experience of the feel of that material. I want the beauty of the image, I want the sexiness of the presentation. The desire to be desired. I lust for the lusting. I want the sexual attention. (Side note...went looking for a picture to add here, and that was stupid. Totally made my heart race and desire increase, it’s almost overpowering.) I want to have a man look at me with that desire. I want to be touched and caressed. I want the feel of someone running their hands over my nylon covered legs. I need to stop this listing of things now, because it’s making it worse. I need to look at these desires and use my steps... stepped away for a few minutes, fed the dog, ate a little breakfast.... I came back to reread and meditate. Rereading took me right back. But by typing here it’s refocused my mind. What could the real need be that is manifesting itself this way. Surely lust is involved but that’s got to be secondary.  What is it that is causing my desire, what is my real need that is manifesting itself this way?[/font][/font]

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  Encouraging Testimony
Posted by: Barnabas - 08-30-2019, 02:49 PM - Forum: Testimonies - No Replies

This is a really interesting testimony, because he talks about both transgender feelings as well as same-sex attraction. Most of the testimonies I read are usually about one or the other. And it seems like most testimonies about transgenderism or crossdressing are cases where the man is attracted to women.

https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/artic...sexuality/

I appreciate his indirect warning about telling people to "fake it." The dangers of faking it and hiding these things are clearly shown through his testimony.

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Wink God can give us victory
Posted by: CDFree - 08-24-2019, 04:34 AM - Forum: Crossdressing Discussions - Replies (1)

I've gone through various usernames, my latest on the prayer group on gmail Mctorie. 

When I signed up to this forum I decided to go with CF free for that is my dream and desire. 


Today I am struggling. The usual reasons and opportunities. 

The thing is, I need to do some shoe shopping for work, which gives opportunities to look, touch and buy some women's clothes. 

I can't avoid those shops. 

Over the last 24 hours i have gone from dreaming of going through with those desires to being disgusted by the thought. 

I drove my wife to work, stupidly early for a Saturday, and have installed myself at a coffee shop until the shop opens. 

In what is only a God moment I couldn't find my normal notebook this morning so took the orange one I use for poetry. 

I was about to write a pro's and con's list. In recovery for self-harm this has helped. The pro's are real feelings in that these things really do provide security, comfort etc. Being honest about that means you can look at "what is it I am actually wanting from this" and thus allows you to look at Christ for that specific thing and find other, healthier, alternatives. 

For instance, for me sometimes CD makes me feel comfortable. But Christ accepts me as I am, and I find comfort in having gotten good stuff done - satisfaction from my toil (ecclesiates 1 or 2?) - without the cons of secrecy, shame, waste of money, guilt. 

So I opened my notebook where I had left the ribbon book mark at the most recent piece of writing i did in there, which was on Monday 13th July 2015. 

Here's what i scribbled: 

"This truth I discovered today as I was repenting of sin this evening: 
"come to me, if you are weary, 
And I will give you rest."

I am often weary of fighting against sin, 
so I give up fighting, and give in. 

But

On the cross, Jesus took my punishment for sin. 
More, He defeated the Devil. 
He cried
"It is finished."

The war is over.
The devil can not defeat me now. 
Therefore, I can rest in that knowledge."

Yes we still need to fight each battle. 
We need to slash and punch out way out of each battle. 

But the WAR has been won! 

God knew I would be be struggling today. 
He ordained that I would write that. 
He ordained me to take that notebook today. 
He even ordained that I would spend time writing this so that i wouldn't be in the shop in the early quiet. 

He ordained Christ to die for our sins. On our behalf. So that we might truly live! 

Friends, brothers and sisters, I pray that we rest in Christ today, not in our sinful desires! 

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  Helping your child with gender dysphoria
Posted by: Barnabas - 08-21-2019, 09:00 AM - Forum: Transgender Discussions - Replies (2)

Here is a short but good article at the Gospel Coalition - https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/artic...sed-child/

John Wants to be Jane: 3 Ways to Counsel a Gender-Confused Child

I appreciated that he dealt with the issue of self-harm

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  Do News Articles Trigger you?
Posted by: Barnabas - 08-16-2019, 07:19 PM - Forum: General Discussion - Replies (2)

I'm guessing that most of you, like me, also watch the news on television or the internet. These days transgender issues are coming up all the time on the news in various ways. When you come across these articles or stories on television, does it trigger you to temptation at all?  And if so, what do you do to deal with it?

I try to keep abreast of all that is going on in our culture concerning crossdressing and transgenderism, so I actually read a lot of the news articles about it. For reasons I'm not fully aware of, but perhaps just because I'm used to it, these articles don't trigger me or make me fantasize or make me tempted to sin. I read them almost no differently than reading any other news article about other subjects.  The only time it might cause me a problem is if there are too many graphic pictures in the article. But even when there are a lot of pictures, most of the time it just makes me feel pity for the people going through dysphoria, and makes me thank the Lord for what he has done in my life to bring me healing from those issues.

What advice do you guys have for those who might be triggered by news articles? It's hard not to see them popping up everywhere these days which can be constant reminders of temptation for some in our community.  Avoiding the news altogether is one option, but that seems a bit extreme.  Ideas?

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  Gender Equality and Career Choice
Posted by: Barnabas - 07-23-2019, 08:55 AM - Forum: Sex and Gender Differences Discussions - No Replies

https://www.thejournal.ie/gender-equalit...6-Feb2018/

This article points out what is becoming more and more reported in articles, research and studies, that is, that the more gender equality and freedom there is in a country, the more divergence there is between the types of careers/jobs that men and women choose.

This confirms, to me, that there are general differences in preference and personality between men and women.  As I've written about before, this doesn't mean we push people into boxes, or shame people who don't fit the generalities for their sex, but it does mean we can actually study and talk about real general differences between men and women.

Thoughts?

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  Prayer for Healing in Gender
Posted by: Barnabas - 07-23-2019, 08:47 AM - Forum: Links to Share - No Replies

This is a helpful prayer from a friend, for those who have struggled or are struggling with gender dysphoria.

https://prodigalminis.wpengine.com/a-pra...masculine/

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