Paraphilias Quote
#1
Interesting quote by Ray Blanchard - "A paraphilia is a sexual orientation that we don't like."

The sexual revolution has a lot of hypocrisy and inconsistency in it. The reality is that something like crossdressing for sexual pleasure is not so different from other paraphilias, but crossdressing now gets a pass, and other paraphilias are still deviant. It's all subjective.

Also interesting to reflect on "sexual orientation". It's a made up idea by psychologists to describe human behavior and desire. By labeling things for so long as sexual orientations, we make them out to be so fixed and unchangeable, and as fixtures of our identity.  It can be helpful to make sense of ourselves and to label the types of attractions we have and seek out others to talk to who have the same ones, but we can also put too much weight on the label.

Thoughts?
1 Corinthians 16:13-14 –
13 Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. 14 Do everything in love.


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#2
(03-31-2021, 04:37 AM)Barnabas Wrote: Interesting quote by Ray Blanchard - "A paraphilia is a sexual orientation that we don't like."

The sexual revolution has a lot of hypocrisy and inconsistency in it. The reality is that something like crossdressing for sexual pleasure is not so different from other paraphilias, but crossdressing now gets a pass, and other paraphilias are still deviant. It's all subjective.

Also interesting to reflect on "sexual orientation". It's a made up idea by psychologists to describe human behavior and desire. By labeling things for so long as sexual orientations, we make them out to be so fixed and unchangeable, and as fixtures of our identity.  It can be helpful to make sense of ourselves and to label the types of attractions we have and seek out others to talk to who have the same ones, but we can also put too much weight on the label.

Thoughts?

Hipocrisy and inconsistency are part of the world and always have been, no matter where or when you live and always will be!

I think that from a whole world perspective that the statement is probably correct. To a "straight" person, is crossdressing, different in that sense from the likes of an adult baby, pony girl, shoe fetishist or any other "deviancy" that you would care to mention - very probably not. But if I put the same question to myself I am very definitely a hypocrite. I do not understand anyone wanting to be an adult baby or what pleasure one can get out of "worshipping"a shoe, but the proponents of these paraphilias wont understand the desire to crossdress either -  not withstanding those with multiple paraphilias. 

So the statement is basically correct - "A paraphilia is a sexual orientation that we dont like", though I would prefer to use Preference as opposed to orientation, as in most cases we choose to carry on with the behaviour - however destructive and only relatively rarely is the paraphilic behaviour brought about by nature and so unchangeable. I had a preference to dress in womens clothing, now I prefer not to, I am and always have been hetrosexually oriented. 

Language is generally fairly useless without labels for objects, but yes labelling ideas is necessary but definitely open to interpretation. Take transvestite. The dictionary meaning of transvestite is "one who dresses in clothes primarily associated with the opposite sex" from the latin, trans = cross, veste = dress,  literally a crossdresser. However, it now is usually associated with homosexuals who crossdress. So labels change with time and no great weight should be attached by an individual labelling themselves or another person.

Sorry for rambling!
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#3
Thanks Keith for the discussion. Where have you seen transvestite used for homosexuals?  My impression was that transvestite is more pejorative these days and used exclusively for crossdressers who do so for sexual pleasure, where the kinder word transgender is used for people who crossdress for reasons of identity (even if they don't identify as the opposite sex).

As far as sexual preference, wasn't that what the new Supreme court justice said in her interview and got lambasted for it?  Haha. Not only does our terminology change fast, but if you don't get the memo about a term that changed a week ago, you are now a bigot this week for using it.

Sexual preference does make sense. I think our sexuality is somewhat changeable. As a Christian, I try hard to be balanced on this. I don't think it's right for people to expect that a homosexual can become a heterosexual, or that a crossdresser will have all of his crossdressing preferences and desires just vanish one day.  People have really been abused in the past, by the church many times trying to help in ways that were unrealistic. At the same time, like you said, clearly most of us were not born with the sexual preferences we have, and so they were learned, and I would think they can be unlearned or morphed to some extent.   Porn addicts get to the point where they cannot get turned on by their wives anymore because their addiction has messed them up so much.  But they can unlearn and eventually be turned on by their wives again.  We can also learn new sexual preferences.   The more you engage in porn or crossdressing fiction, the more you start delving into other things that are new and interesting , as the old stuff gets old. There are countless stories of people getting into homosexuality, bestiality or other things who never intended to, because of the way their addiction kept taking them deeper. I experienced a bit of that with crossdressing fiction, which always seemed to include other fetishes and paraphilias in the stories.
1 Corinthians 16:13-14 –
13 Be on your guard; stand firm in the faith; be men of courage; be strong. 14 Do everything in love.


Reply
#4
(04-01-2021, 01:20 AM)Barnabas Wrote: Thanks Keith for the discussion. Where have you seen transvestite used for homosexuals?  My impression was that transvestite is more pejorative these days and used exclusively for crossdressers who do so for sexual pleasure, where the kinder word transgender is used for people who crossdress for reasons of identity (even if they don't identify as the opposite sex).

As far as sexual preference, wasn't that what the new Supreme court justice said in her interview and got lambasted for it?  Haha. Not only does our terminology change fast, but if you don't get the memo about a term that changed a week ago, you are now a bigot this week for using it.

Sexual preference does make sense. I think our sexuality is somewhat changeable. As a Christian, I try hard to be balanced on this. I don't think it's right for people to expect that a homosexual can become a heterosexual, or that a crossdresser will have all of his crossdressing preferences and desires just vanish one day.  People have really been abused in the past, by the church many times trying to help in ways that were unrealistic. At the same time, like you said, clearly most of us were not born with the sexual preferences we have, and so they were learned, and I would think they can be unlearned or morphed to some extent.   Porn addicts get to the point where they cannot get turned on by their wives anymore because their addiction has messed them up so much.  But they can unlearn and eventually be turned on by their wives again.  We can also learn new sexual preferences.   The more you engage in porn or crossdressing fiction, the more you start delving into other things that are new and interesting , as the old stuff gets old. There are countless stories of people getting into homosexuality, bestiality or other things who never intended to, because of the way their addiction kept taking them deeper. I experienced a bit of that with crossdressing fiction, which always seemed to include other fetishes and paraphilias in the stories.

Think that you are correct regarding the use of the word transvestite and I have got it mixed up somewhere in the crazy world of terminology. How did "Gay" change from a female name into describing homosexuality is a case in point!
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